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The one-particle-irreducible scalar two-point function has three one-loop topologies: a scalar-photon exchange loop built from two cubic vertices; a photon tadpole at one seagull vertex; and a scalar tadpole at one quartic vertex. The last is absent when $\lambda =0$. Reducible chains of self-energy insertions belong to the Dyson expansion and are not additional one-loop self-energy graphs. The scalar-QED photon-tadpole symmetry factor is $1/2$ because its two identical photon legs are joined; the oriented complex-scalar tadpole has no such identical-real-line factor.