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A hydrogen bond acceptor supplies the electron-rich atom or group $Y$ interacting with the attached hydrogen of a hydrogen bond donor in $X-\mathrm{H}\cdots Y$. An oxygen lone pair in water is the familiar example. Acceptance describes the association, not necessarily acquisition of a proton. A single molecule, such as water or ammonia, can offer both hydrogen bond donor and hydrogen bond acceptor sites. See Glasfeld: water and nitrogen-containing accepting sites.

A lone pair drawn in a Lewis structure is a useful clue, not a universal test. At an ordinary neutral amide nitrogen, the nominal lone pair participates in chemical resonance with the carbonyl group, so this nitrogen is ordinarily excluded from lists of hydrogen bond acceptors; the carbonyl group's oxygen remains an accepting site. Protonation changes the test again: ${\mathrm{NH}}_4^{+}$ has four N–H covalent bonds and no nitrogen lone pair, whereas ammonia has three and one. These distinctions follow the actual chemical form, and accepting ability also depends on the partner and whether it can approach the site. See McMurry: amide resonance and protonation and Glasfeld: limitations of nitrogen accepting sites.

Conversely, an accepting group need not supply an atom-centred lone pair. The following phenol–benzene experiment probes an O–H donor interacting with the ring's distributed $\pi$ electron density.

Saggu, Levinson and Boxer (2011) used infrared spectroscopy to compare $200\mathrm{mmol}{\mathrm{L}}^{-1}$ phenol in different solvents. The O–H stretching peak was at $3611\mathrm{c}{\mathrm{m}}^{-1}$ in ${\mathrm{CCl}}_4$ and $3555.9\mathrm{c}{\mathrm{m}}^{-1}$ in benzene. To distinguish association from a general solvent effect, they diluted the ring-containing chemical solutions with ${\mathrm{CCl}}_4$: two peaks appeared, with the free peak nearly fixed while the associated peak depended on the partner. Replacing the O–H hydrogen with deuterium reproduced the ordering of shifts for different partners. Thus the perturbed O–H group identifies the hydrogen bond donor; the ring supplies the hydrogen bond acceptor. A peak shift alone does not specify a unique molecular geometry. ^[ref]

The roles make recognition between molecules intelligible: exposed hydrogen bond donors need compatible hydrogen bond acceptors in reachable positions. A count of sites is a starting description, not a prediction of binding strength. In water, forming a contact between two partners can also replace their existing hydrogen bonds to water; the Gibbs free energy of association concerns the whole change. See Glasfeld, pp. 15–16: competition with solvent interactions.

Phenol is benzene with one ring hydrogen replaced by a hydroxy group. That O–H group supplies the hydrogen bond donor in the experiment under hydrogen bond acceptor. ^[ref]